Hup, Hup, Hup, Uptown Sport

Oh here we go again…..

We did the sporty look for Autumn Winter, and I found it hard enough to write about then. Now I have to find something new to say about sweatshirts, joggers and athletic shorts.

Ho hum.

So, this look is apparently influenced by the 1980s, which means (with this interpretation) loud, almost neon colours and metallics. Now funny, I was at university in the Eighties and what I remember is a lot of jeans and black teeshirts. Hey, maybe I just didn’t mix with the fashionable crowd. Or maybe fashion never made it all the way to Hull. Probably the latter: after all, even the M62 stops short eight miles from the city, and who can blame it, City of Culture or no?

This Uptown Sports look is basically lots of sporty shapes, but done in distinctly non-sporty fabrics and with lots of embellishment. Doubtless you remember that this winter, and especially around Christmas, you couldn’t move for sparkly Christmas jumpers. This season it will probably be sequinned hoodies.  They’ll probably come in useful to blind the CCTV camera with reflective glare when we finally succumb to the urge to rob the off-licence!

Just saying, you understand; no offence meant!

So anyway – if you know darn well that you look great in the sporty look, and you’re confident that you don’t look tarty as soon as the glitter goes on – oh and you’re not over a certain age (not being drawn on that one, girls – you know what age I mean, and it’s different for all of us), then feel free to experiment with this look. Let’s just see what’s out there, shall we?

And actually, when we start to really look, there are just a couple of things that some of us might do without having to have two thirds of a bottle of Pino Grigio first.

Circular Skater skirt from H&M in a quilted jaquard fabric. Can't see this one on the ice, can you?
Circular Skater skirt from H&M in a quilted jaquard fabric. Can’t see this one on the ice, can you?

The skater skirt is a classic sporty look, but there are other skirt shapes that also fall into the Uptown Sport – although what sport one could possibly do in this one I hate to think, but poles and dancing come into it somewhere…

It may look brazen girls, but it's jersey and will stretch as you balance upside down doing the splits!
It may look brazen girls, but it’s jersey and will stretch as you balance upside down doing the splits!

Then there’s the asymmetric wrap….

I have a skirt this shape in a beautiful coral Italian tweed. My mother asked if the button had slipped, because it was all skew-whiff!
I have a skirt this shape in a beautiful coral Italian tweed. My mother asked if the button had slipped, because it was all skew-whiff! Thanks, Mummy. Now you know I was just being fashionable!

But enough of the skirts, what about dresses?

Well, there are two choices. Tight or loose. Here’s the tight look

The skater dress again. Note the stripes, crossing over with the post urban traveller look.
The skater dress again. Note the stripes, crossing over with the post urban traveller look.

But, if we feel that may be just a little unforgiving, we may prefer something a little more roomy….

Here's how to smuggle the entire rugby team home with you without anyone noticing.
The dress with which to smuggle the entire rugby team home with you without anyone noticing.

Or how about something a little more dressy and with some of those embellishments I talked about?

Just a warning: this model is 5'10" and wears a size 10. I'm not sure this is altogether the most flattering cut I've seen...
Just a warning: this model is 5’10” and wears a size 10. I’m not sure this is altogether the most flattering cut I’ve seen…

What about a jacket to go over this then? Satin bomber jacket, anyone (now surely that is the eighties)?

Oh, and do check out the imitation leather shorts: yodel eh eh hey!
Oh, and do check out the imitation leather shorts: yodel eh eh hey!

We’ve also got panelled biker jackets in contrasting fabrics.

leather and suede jacket and No! Never! Is that really a ra-ra skirt?
leather and suede jacket and No! Never! Is that really a ra-ra skirt? Oh, we are back in the eighties, aren’t we!

Well, it’s been fun, but I’m running out of scathing comments here, so I’ll just leave you with the luxe fabric jogger (funny – I’ve always called them harem pants) and a mixed fabric sweater and finally – something that even the most staid of retailers can get behind  (some of you might even recognise this example because you too get the catalogue), the graphic print tee-shirt.

What did I tell you? Harem pants. I mean, would you go jogging in these? Even if you went jogging at all?
What did I tell you? Harem pants. I mean, would you go jogging in these? Well, OK, if you ever did go jogging at all, would you?
Patchwork jumper. Now My mother knits much more exciting jumpers than this one. Seriously more exciting. I'll show you sometime.
Patchwork jumper. Now My mother knits much more exciting jumpers than this one. Seriously more exciting. I’ll show you sometime.

And lastly – yes, I’m going to order one of these from Lands End!

Because it's pretty and fun.
Because it’s pretty and fun.

Well, so long for now. Next week we travel to Woodstock and Glastonbury for that Festival spirit, so break out the cheesecloth, headscarf and wellies and be sure to wear a flower in your hair!

 

 

 

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